Rebound Relationships - Do they Work?
In my opinion, most of the times, rebound relationships just don't work. Let us review the events that lead to and happen in a rebound relationship.
- Event #1: You break up/get dumped by someone you really love.
- Event #2: You sulk and wonder, 'Why did he or she leave me?'.
- Event #3: Your friends cannot bear to see you sad. They take you out to bars and lounges to prove to you that there are many more 'fishes in the sea'. You, on the other hand, sulk.
- Event #4: Finally, after a lot of convincing, and your inherent desire to prove to your ex boyfriend/ex girlfriend that dumping you was a big mistake, you hook up with someone new.
- Event #5: You parade your new girlfriend/boyfriend around everywhere. You follow your ex and show off the fact that you could indeed find 'true love'. Your ex doesn't care.
- Event #6: After you realize that your ex didn't even give your new relationship a second look, and is in fact quite content with himself/herself, and you realize that the basic premise of your current relationship - revenge, itself is not only a wrong way to start a relationship but has also been an awful flop and you're not even sure of your new flame's last name, you know it's over.
What went wrong here? Simply speaking, this rebound relationship was not a relationship at all. It was an arrangement. The basic premise for a relationship should be love and a common desire to keep each other happy. If you started your relationship with the objective of getting revenge; well, then it's going to be a pretty bad experience for you and a worse experience for the 'love' you found on the rebound (who will probably badmouth you for treating them the way you did). Read on for rebound relationships – how long do they last?
Rebound Relationship Advice
So then, what is the best relationship advice to fix that achy, breaky heart? Well, rebound relationships after divorce or after a relationship breakup are not the way to go. Yes, you need to find someone new, but not ANYONE! Take your time, find someone you really like, someone that you share a lot in common with, someone you think you can love for the rest of your life (you may not, but it is always better to start on that positive note!). A loveless rebound relationship only leaves a trail of broken hearts and mends none. Always remember that line... love is never jealous... never brags... does not behave indecently... and so on.
On the other hand, if you are in a relationship with a person who just got off a bad break up, run away. Women are more prone to fall into a relationship with a man who's looking for a rebound because their caring, maternal nature leads them into feeling sorry for them and help them at the cost of the woman's own pride and time. So the best relationship advice for womenis to stay away from such guys. It is rare that a man will fall for a woman on the rebound. If you do not know if the person you're dating is doing so for revenge/self-image improvement, the rebound relationship signs are quite easy to identify. They don't listen, they look around, they don't talk, when they do talk - it's about their ex, they take you on a detective trip to follow their ex, and the worst case is when they draw unfair comparisons between you and the damned ex, with you being on the disadvantaged side in the comparison. Dump that person, you deserve better!
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