Egoism

This post is probably written out of anger. But then again, the best time to write something is when you're full of the "feeling", right?


He builds a wall and he wears the wall.
The wall is aimed to be defensive and strong so he can tackle the challenges in life.
He has fire, a strong desire for materials and life's temporary pleasures.
He charged towards his goals, at full force.
Confident with what he is doing because he thinks he has built his wall strong enough.
His wall is so thick that he is not receptive towards other people's opinions and concerns, especially those who cared deeply for him.
He even take it as a personal attack so he brutally pushed and knocked them away.
He stood on top of a high rock, claiming to be somebody outstanding with his marvellous plans.
He looks down and constantly pick on others' flaws.
By pointing out other people's flaws, he felt good about himself.

He brags a lot.
But he does not work hard.
Because the wall he is wearing seem to be pretty heavy.
He took others for granted.
He called himself "king" and in fact he is a fool.
A king of fools.
Yes, you're a fool who give yourself excuses everyday.
You blame on luck.
You blame on other people.
You never regret what you did and you blame God for your failures.
You failed to see your mistakes and you disappoint the people who tried to help you.
You always failed to see the consequences of your actions.
You have lived a long life.
Perhaps you should stop blaming life.
Perhaps you should change your ways.
Perhaps life would be different then.

I cannot always live behind your shadow of misery, whereby I do not feel protected under your wall.
In fact, I felt threatened and insecure.
You keep taking.
You do not give.
Live in your wall, as you wished.
But I have no desire, hope, whatsoever that one day you will wake up and change.
As much as I sympathize you for your "misfortune", I have to realize that it's time for me to move on.
As you do not even have sympathy for me, after all what you have put me through.
Instead of letting myself get hurt again,
I am setting myself free.

NS Gathering At Pavillion

It was the time of the year again, whereby my friends from NS and I meet up. If you ask me, I really hated NS. Although I have been there only for a month, it felt so long. I disliked the pointless things we did everyday. We woke up at 5am plus in the morning, had to line up at the hall at 6am. We would stone until 7am only we can start exercising. I thought by going to NS, I can build at least 4 packs, but the exercises weren't strenuous at all. And instead of building muscles and losing weight, I gained 2kg. The food there was nice though, to me.

I do not like taking orders from people who are less.... I cannot find the word to describe. These kind of people simply give orders without any reason by doing so, for the sake of showing authority. And the mental/mind development programme was lousy. Trainers were afraid of me because I often question about what and why are we doing something. Other trainees liked that I was not afraid to bring up certain issues. People may say that it is stupid to stand up for something and get disliked by certain people. It was a risk that most people unwilling to take. But I didn't care, I was going to leave the place soon anyway.

There is a common belief that by going to NS, you will lose more weight, become more independent and more mature in a way. That didn't work for me. I still think the programme can be improved. However, I have heard some of my friends' attitudes has changed tremendously since they have been there. Perhaps they were fortunate to have good trainers. Or either that, they do really need such programmes to wake them up from reality and bring them out from their shells.

Although I have a lot more criticism towards NS, there are some good things which were worth remembering. I've got new friends. And the bond between us is different and strong, despite knowing each other for a short period of time. At that time, our education backgrounds, statuses and differences did not matter. I mixed around with the Chinese-speaking people because they were much more friendly. I have to force myself to speak Chinese as some of them could not speak English well. The language was not a barrier. The desire to have fun together and helping each other out was much stronger. And I believe that this kind of friendship is a lasting one, because we've been through good and bad times together. We cried, stood up for each other, took care of each other when we were sick, laughed, danced and sang together. It was wonderful.

On 17th November, only 5 of us managed to turn up although it's a public holiday.

We met up at Pavillion. Pavillion was decorated beautifully for the coming Christmas.

Me, Joanne, Pei Yiaw, Sim Mei and Yi Hui

A little introduction to each of them.

Yi hui

She was also known as "Xiao Zhu" because she used to have a short hair which made her looked rather similiar to the Taiwan artiste.

The moment I saw her, I was captivated by her beauty. It was love at first sight. She has eyes so large and beautiful, a very sharp jawline and her smile is very cheeky and sweet.

We were very close, as if like a couple. Because I kept expressing my love for her. I was known as "Jolin" (I looked nothing like the gorgeous Taiwan star, of course) because the way I danced during a practice. And she was "Xiao Zhu". So we became a very popular couple.

I was so used to being taken care by my mother at home and my boyfriend(that time) that I felt the need to be taken care of even here, in NS. She did things for me. We shared our food, slept on the bed wearing nothing but a towel, bathed together, sang, danced and others.

It was very romantic.

(I bet she will get a little annoyed if she reads this,haha)

I even composed a song, sang and played on the guitar for her. I still remembered the lyrics, dear. Do you?

I never felt this way before,

Such a beautiful girl right before me,

Eyes like spegetti meatballs,

Lovely smile like Keira Knightley

Hey sexy pig,

You stole my heart my heart and soul,

I will never let you go,

Hey sexy pig,

Your kisses melt my heart,

Your ass is so hard,

Yeah sexy pig!

(I will sing to you again if you request for it)

Okay, I shall introduce you Joanne. Pretty girl with strong personality. She was one of the very few who can speak English fluently. She's still single. Make a deal with me. ;)

Next, Pei Yiaw, also known as "Yiaw Yiaw" because we love the way she shakes her ass. She's also pretty. (In fact, all the girls I am introducing are attractive) I love her spontaneous, fun and "daring" personality. She was the one dared to do silly things with me during NS. Also my belly dancer partner/companion.

Finally, Sim Mei. She fits the typical stereotype of a girl. Demure and sweet. She was the fair maiden who sits in the corner of our dorm combing her beautiful long black hair.

We went karaoke at Red Box Plus. I love singing. It has been some time. We also sang "Hero" by Mariah Carey and "Better Man" by Robbie Williams. These two songs brought a lot of memories from NS.

Note that in most of the pictures I was closing my mouth. I was trying to hide the hideous pimple on my chin. It was a suggestion from Xiao Zhu.

After finishing our karaoke session, we checked out other rooms. And we came across this VIP room and we just have to sneak in to check it out!

Finally, a couple of pictures more and ice-cream, then we parted, again.

Happy, happy moments. =D

Tour Guide For Japanese Students (26 October)

I was supposed to blog about this few weeks ago but I was kind of reluctant due to the lack of picture quality (they don't allow flash) and I looked like Alice from Wonderland who got lost in KL.

It was an invitation to work as a tour guide for high school Japanese students. I thought it would be fun mixing with new people. I was more interested in the experience than the pay. Japanese students are rather different from Malaysian students. They are very obedient and cute. Whenever they see cute stuff, they would be exclaiming "Kawaii!!" Peace signs are also part of their culture.

So I went to Istana Hotel and met up with my UTAR friends.

Sexy Hazel And I. She has a hot body which I am envious of now. Lol.

Hazel, Me and pretty Jac.

We had lunch at a mamak nearby. We simply ordered lots of food because the boss was treating us. And we didn't finish it. Impulse. Desire.

Us wasting food.

Next to Hazel is Georyn, she's a very attractive person!


So we went and collect our students, which Jac called them our "babies". I have 9 students in hand. And I tried to remember all their names.

Hazel's babies.

My babies.

First place to visit. KL tower.

Hazel and Jac brought their babies up to see the whole view of KL.

My babies don't want so we end up shopping.

Then,we went to KLCC. Aquaria.

My babies trying to get a taste from a horseshoe crab's bite.

There is this thing in the Aquaria, whereby you can put your head under aquarium. My babies found that fascinating.

Piranhas.

Electric Eels.

Green snake.

Dead Butterflies.

Big Fish.

More fishes.

Smiling frog.

Sad tadpoles.

Cute Coatimundi.

Aki Katsube. The group leader.

Masaaki Hirota.

Mahiru Wada.

Mai Morishira.

Sara Takahashi

Shunta Tamaki

Sachiho Wakasa

Kenta Ikeda

Ayaka Yoshiwaki

We went on a escalator thing where giant fishes swim above and beside us.

Then, we went shopping again. I like the sharks.





Lunch at Mcd.

I guess the influence of taking photos of food comes from the Japanese. Lol.

We board the train to Pasar Seni. My babies laughed at the advertisement board and Aki posed.

Hung around Chinatown with Jacqueline and her babies.

Finally, we head back to the hotel and took some pictures.

The guys.

Jac and I.

Elize and Kelvin, the cute couple who fetched me back.

So what did I gain from this experience?

1) RM100

2) Get to know places around KL.

3) New friends. =)